Surely you’ve noticed that there’s tons of ways you’re subtly pressured into being a specific type of person. You’re agreeable, unlikely to talk to strangers, and generally conformist.
I don’t think this is a very good way to live. I think rather than being agreeable, it’s preferable to be disagreeable. This is because you can have convictions, and ideas about the world. The life of a mind requires a certain intolerance for ideas that are poorly thought out. To love the good, you must learn to hate that which is bad. You can’t agree, because to do so would sacrifice that which you hold dear.
There is a good reason to fear strangers, you never know what they can do to you, or what their beliefs are. On the other hand, fearing strangers is not viable either, because to thrive, you need strong connections. To make those strong connections, you need to get to know people, many of which are or have been strangers to you. Talking to strangers is intrinsically pleasant because you learn things you wouldn’t expect. You become exposed to both marvelous and frankly shocking thoughts. Over time, you get better at learning who’s worth spending more time talking to.
Finally, being conformist is terrible, in large part, because everyone tries to do so. There is little alpha in being like others, when you can be worse. Consider that when you drop social pretenses and love yourself, you’re free to do almost anything. This is because you don’t need to justify yourself to anyone. This is valuable for all the reasons you imagine and more.
There is often joy in doing that which others refuse. Not to say that something is inherently worth it, because few things are, but challenging what’s automatic can result in interesting syntheses.
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